[Today's post is by Dr. Wayde Goodall, author of Success Kills. Goodall and his wife, Rosalyn, are authors, speakers, life coaches, ministry consultants and pastors traveling extensively around the globe holding family events and seminars. Success Kills, published by New Leaf Press, is Goodall's 14th book.]
This sad story of a family literally falling apart in front of our eyes can be a “warning light” for many who are thinking about compromising in their own marriages.
Here are some tips on how to keep the infidelity temptation at bay:
- Be honest with your spouse: The experts say “honesty is the trump card for preventing affairs.” Make a commitment to share your attractions and temptations. Dishonesty and deception cause affairs to flourish.
- Examine your marriage: Ask yourself if there is something missing and be willing to try to fix it.
- Daily watch for temptation: Do you feel connected with the person your work with? Is there sexual tension when you are around them? Do you find yourself thinking or daydreaming about them in a sexual way? Warning signs! These can easily develop into traps…avoid them!
- Don’t flirt: “That is how affairs start. Flirting is not part of an innocent friendship. If you think there might be a problem with someone you flirt with, there probably is a problem.” Says Bonnie Eaker Weil, www.makeupdontbreakup.com.
- The Internet can be your friend – or enemy: You can develop an emotional affair overnight online.
- Erase old relationships: Marital research expert Dr. Shirley Glass says, “If you value your marriage, think twice about having lunch with one, invite your partner along.” Better yet, stay away from old flings altogether.
- Work at growing intimacy in your marriage: Be great friends with your spouse. Be vulnerable, transparent, and have open conversations with them.
- Hang around with people with good or great marriages: Don’t hang out with people who fool around, bad-mouth their spouse, or are constantly flirting. Run with good company.
There are very good reasons why some marriages are working and why some are not. I’d like to see your thoughts on infidelity in marriage and ideas on how to protect a marriage from this very complicated problem.